مشاوره ازدواج - مرکز مشاوره اسپادانا

چگونه می‌توانید بفهمید که به مشاوره ازدواج نیاز دارید

اگر ازدواجتان به مشکل خورده‌است، اصلاً نباید برای دریافت کمک از متخصص بیش‌از اندازه تأمل کنید. شاید یافتن مشاور مناسبی که بتواند به رابطه‌تان کمک کند، دشوار باشد اما چنین مشاوری وجود دارد و آماده کمک کردن است. برای یافتن مشاور متخصص در زمینه ازدواج یا مشاوره ازدواج، راه‌هایی وجود دارد. ممکن است برای پیداکردن مشاور مناسب مجبور شوید با بیش‌از یک مشاور ملاقات کنید. برای برآورد اینکه مشاوره برای ازدواجتان مفید خواهد بود یا خیر، راه‌های متفاوتی وجود دارد. خوشبختانه، اطلاعاتی داریم که نشان می‌دهد مشاوره ازدواج برای کدام زوج‌ها بسیار مفید و برای کدام زوج‌ها بی‌فایده است.

پرسش‌های زیر را در نظر بگیرید:

  • آیا در سن پایین ازدواج کردید؟
  • آیا از دبیرستان فارغ‌التحصیل نشده‌اید؟
  • آیا جزو اقشار کم‌درآمد هستید؟
  • آیا دین شما و همسرتان متفاوت است؟
  • آیا والدین شما طلاق گرفته‌اند؟
  • آیا اغلب از یکدیگر انتقاد می‌کنید؟
  • آیا در ازدواجتان حالت دفاعی دارید؟
  • آیا تمایل دارید از یکدیگر دوری کنید؟
  • آیا نسبت به دیگری بی‌اعتنا یا از او خشمگین هستید؟
  • از نظر شما ارتباط متقابلتان ضعیف است؟
  • در ازدواجتان با خیانت، اعتیاد یا بدرفتاری مواجه شده‌اید؟

اگر به اکثر این پرسش‌ها پاسخ «بله» دادید، آن‌گاه به‌لحاظ آماری احتمال طلاق شما بیشتر است. این موضوع بدین معنا نیست که طلاق اجتناب‌ناپذیر است، بلکه ممکن است بدین معنا باشد که برای اصلاح رابطه‎‌تان باید بیشتر تلاش کنید. در آن دسته از زوج‌هایی که انتظاراتی واقع‌بینانه از یکدیگر و ازدواجشان دارند، به خوبی با هم ارتباط برقرار می‌کنند، از مهارت‌های رفع تعارض استفاده می‌کنند و با یکدیگر سازگار هستند، احتمال طلاق کمتر است.

اثربخشی مشاوره زناشویی

این روزها، روش‌های تشخیص اثربخشی مشاوره ازدواج به طور دقیق‌تری در حال بررسی هستند. داده‌های به دست آمده از پژوهش‌ها، گهگاهی با هم ترکیب شده‌اند و بعضی از پژوهش‌ها ثابت کرده‌است که مشاوره زناشویی به میزانی که عامه فکر می‌کنند، مؤثر نیست. همچنین به نظر می‌رسد که زنان نسبت به مردان بهره بیش‌تری از آن می‌برند و ممکن است آثار مشاوره بر زندگی زناشویی زوج پایدار نباشد. برخلاف این ادعاها، ما فکر می‌کنیم که دریافت کمک از متخصص پیش از اینکه مشکلات به مرحله بحرانی برسند، برای زندگی مشترک یک زوج بسیار سودمند است.

موثرترین درمان که بیشترین مطالعه نیز روی آن صورت گرفته است، مشاوره ازدواج هیجان محور (EFT) است که دکتر سو جانسون آن را پی‌ریزی کرده‌است. همچنین نتایج نشان می‌دهند که این نوع از مشاوره، برای زوج‌هایی که ریشه‌های فرهنگی و نژادی متفاوتی دارند، مفید و پایدار واقع می‌شود. همچنین انجمن مشاوره خانواده و ازدواج آمریکا (AAMFT) طی تحقیقی نشان داد که خانواده‌ها واقعاً به دریافت مشاوره تمایل دارند و بعد از تجربه دوره‌های درمانی امتیاز بالایی به مشاوره می‌دهند.

مشاوره ازدواج برای چه نوع زوج‌هایی مفید است؟

  • زوج‌های جوان
  • زوج‌هایی که تعصب جنسیتی ندارند و خواهان تساوی هستند
  • زوج‌هایی که هنوز عاشق یکدیگر هستند
  • زوج‌هایی که مایل به درمان و تغییر هستند
  • شریک‌هایی که می‌خواهند خودشان و مشکلاتشان را بررسی کنند

مشاوره ازدواج برای چه نوع زوج‌هایی چندان مفید نیست؟

  • زوج‌هایی که خیلی دیر به مشاوره مراجعه می‌کنند
  • ازدواج‌هایی که یکی از طرفین آن برای طلاق مصمم باشد
  • زوج‌هایی که پیشنهادهای نجات‌دهنده ازدواجشان را نمی‌پذیرند
  • ازدواج‌هایی که یکی از طرفین به الکل، مواد مخدر یا پورنوگرافی اعتیاد داشته باشد
  • ازدواج‌هایی یکی از طرفین به جلسه‌های مشاوره می‌آید اما به آن علاقه‌ای نشان نمی‌دهد

برای مراجعه به مشاور صبر نکنید

اگر فکر می‌کنید که در ازدواجتان با مشکل روبه‌رو شده‌اید، صبر نکنید. هرچه زودتر کمک درخواست کنید. برای رفع مشکل، پول و زمانتان را هزینه کنید. هرچه دیرتر مراجعه کنید شاید سخت‌تر بتوانید رابطه‌تان را به حالت قبلی‌اش بازگردانید. باید به محض مشاهده نشانه‌های هشداردهنده، مشاور متخصص ازدواج پیدا کنید یا دوره‌های آموزشی ازدواج را بگذرانید یا در جلسه‌های به‌اشتراک‌گذاری تجربیات شرکت کنید.

درباره نویسنده
مرکز مشاوره اسپادانا

مرکز مشاوره اسپادانا در شهر اصفهان فعالیت دارد. این مرکز مشاوره، افتخار دارد که کادری مجهز و زبده از روانشناس ها و روانپزشکان را در کنار خود داشته باشد. 

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